Letters To and From Spirit

On having preferences

Aug 31, 2023

To Spirit:


Please help me. I am noticing preferences I have, and they seem to be examples of special love and special hate. I like this one, I don’t like this one. You have told me that I learn through contrast, and this contrast seems very evident in my mind right now. I bring it to you so we can look at it together. I think I have judged myself for having preferences in the past, and I am interested in being able to learn from the contrast and not judge myself at the same time. I do not wish to block the light of the world.

Spirit, please help me.

From Spirit:

Dear one,

Your willingness to notice the judgments you have been placing on yourself is received and produces immediate results. Let me help you now, there is confusion here.

You do not need to stop yourself from having preferences. Nor do you benefit from judging yourself or others for this. Judging yourself does seem to block the light of the world, as you have been taught. You help yourself then by learning from contrast and also remembering that you do not need to worry about the seeming contrast. It is not real, but you are being taught to let what is not real guide you home to what is. Deny it not. It can help you.

You’re noticing a preference you have for one brother over another. Yes, this does highlight for you examples of craving and aversion, special love and special hate. You are wise in recognizing the opportunity to practice. Let it be this and be grateful that you understand the practice! Let the preference give you fodder for practice, and do not fight yourself as this defeats the purpose at which your practice is aimed.

Your dream character will have preferences so long as she seems to exist to you. The preferences highlight beliefs for you to practice with. Find the beliefs and bring those to me. Judge yourself not for the appearance of a preference in relationships. Do you judge yourself for preferring certain foods over others?

The practice is catching and bringing false beliefs to the light. If you find you have a preference because you believe the person/object/situation will save you, the belief is what you bring to me. Similarly, bring to me any belief that a specific person/object/situation is doing something bad to you. You bring the false beliefs to the light, and as you do so you’ll notice that some preferences may still remain.

You do not need to rid yourself of preferences. Do not aim your practice at this. Some dream characters like vanilla and some prefer chocolate. The practice is not making either into your salvation. This type of false belief is all you are asked to catch and release.

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